Feast

Title: Feast (2005)
Dir: John Gulager
Rating: ***1/2 out of 5 stars



I am so thankful I got to see this in theatres. There's nothing quite like an old-school horror film on the big screen! Feast, the horror project created through Project Greenlight, is flawed but still a bloody good time (pun fully intended).

First, let me acquaint you with a few of Heather's guidelines for making a good horror film:
1) No heavy reliance on CGI. Get your hands dirty, for Christ's sake!
2) Find yourself a first-time director.
3) Don't be afraid of comedy. It is your friend.

Feast happily fulfills these three qualities. The film is set in a small-town bar, where a ragtag group of locals are ambushed by some ravenous monsters. Gulager, making his directorial debut, was wise to limit his film to one location, both for the sake of the script and the finances. He does defy one golden rule of horror filmmaking - use a small cast. However, he somehow managed to keep us interested in all the characters, despite how may there were. Kudos, sir!

My only real problem with Gulager - and this movie - is the jumpy directing style that renders the film almost unwatchable at times. But with a low-budget and short production span, I am not surprised, either. Beyond that everything is gravy! Feast is beautifully gory, often in original ways. There may have been some CGI, but not any that I recall. Much of the splatter is done really well.

Feast homages Evil Dead 2 quite a bit, but not so much that it feels derivative (*cough*Versus*cough). Expect some silly humor, at which you will either roll your eyes, or laugh out loud (especially if you enjoy old Peter Jackson work). Not all of the jokes worked for me, but many did.

I pretty much loved everyone in the cast. Gulager deliberately assigned them to be horror stereotypes, which is both original and a lot of fun. And this guy really loves the pull the rug out from under you. He'll set it up like traditional horror, and then do a complete 180 on you. As long as he tones down the hyper direction, I'd like to see what Gulager does next.

Since I didn't actually finish this review until October 27th, Feast is now on DVD. I suggest you check it out.

**Sidenote: While I was Googling the film to find the poster, I came across this...

...and I can't stop laughing now.

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Hollywoodland

Title: Hollywoodland (2006)
Dir: Allen Coulter
Rating: **1/2 out of 5 stars



Hollywoodland is about a shady detective (Adrien Brody) trying to solve the case of George "Superman" Reeves' death. It flashes between the detective's sleuthing and the life of Reeves (portrayed by Ben Affleck).

I think it is a story worth telling, but it just didn't grab me like, say, LA Confidential. Brody, yet again, did not impress me, nor did Affleck. Sure, he's fatter, but still nothing special as an actor. Bob Hoskins, ever the fine actor, is great but not particularly useful here.

The first thing I thought when I left this movie: "A wanna-be Chinatown." It had that feel, but Hollywoodland doesn't even come close. It had some interesting moments, but overall it just didn't thrill me. And the ending is a complete anti-climax. I felt pretty cheated.

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Land of the Dead

Title: Land of the Dead (2005)
Dir: George Romero
Rating: * out of 5 stars



Look up disappointment in the dictionary. And that's my review for Land of the Dead.

Seriously, what the hell, George?

Let's get this out of the way first: Romero movies are the last place I ever want to see CGI gore, but goddammit, they used it anyway! Even Greg Nicotero's work here was disappointingly subpar, though still bounds ahead of the useless computer-generated splatter. Some really cool gore scenes were RUINED by this shit. Grrrrrrrrrr!!!

I guess I should describe the film before I go on. As you should already know, it is the fourth installment in Romero's zombie series. The film focuses on a city where the zombies are barricaded out, but inside the humans are divided between the crime-ridden poor, and the comfortable rich, who reside safely in a gigantic mall (that last part sound familiar?). Meanwhile, the zombies are getting smarter and figuring a way into the city.

Okay, now back to my rant: I'd always admired Romero's previous attempts to criticize society and government through his zombie films, but the idea falls flat on its face in Land. I didn't give a damn about the poverty-stricken people, and I didn't sufficiently hate the spoiled rich either - even Dennis Hopper's character, who created this social divide. In short, I didn't give two shits about anyone in this movie, good or bad; human or zombie.

The plot - something to do with John Leguizamo stealking a tank and a group of 'good' guys getting it back - gets completely ridiculous. All of the actors are equal parts obnoxious and unlikable. And like its MUCH better predecessor Day of the Dead, this film tries to make us sympathize with the zombies, and WOW does it fail!

I couldn't have cared less if Land's Big Daddy got his rotting skull smashed in with a 9-iron, whereas I would have given Day's Bub a hug even at the risk of losing my grey matter. Nothing about this film's zombies impressed me or made me remotely like them. Nor were they sufficiently scary enough to fulfill their horror role. What a waste. This movie is frustrating for Romero fans like me. I love you old man, but you had better make up for this with Diary of the Dead!

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Dead Man's Shoes

Title: Dead Man's Shoes (2004)
Dir: Shane Meadows
Rating: ***1/2 out of 5 stars



I had heard that Paddy Considine is like a young Gary Oldman, and having seen Dead Man's Shoes now, I can definitely agree with that. People really need to take notice of this guy.

The film is about a British soldier (Considine) who returns home to exact revenge against some thugs who hurt his mentally-challenged brother. As he hunts them down one-by-one, the movie could've easily turned into another Kill Bill; but interestingly enough, Shoes plays out like a slasher film. Only this time, the maniac is the protagonist - the hero, even.

But that's where the line becomes blurred. This film challenges you to ask: who is the real monster? Don't expect an easy answer to that. I guess the point is, we all have our demons.

So why the moderate rating? Well, I wasn't too fond of the ending. And some of the story gets silly, especially toward the end. But a second viewing probably would be good for me. I should also mention that the accents are VERY difficult to understand sometimes, and the DVD lacks English captions. But the story is easy enough to follow.

Dead Man's Shoes is dark and depressing, and not likely the kind of film I'd pop in the player for fun. But its heavy message and even heavier performances are worth seeing. And seeing Paddy with a gas mask and an ax is pretty badass.

On a related note, I'm still pouting that Considine wasn't chosen to be Joker in The Dark Knight *sniffle*

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Little Miss Sunshine

Title: Little Miss Sunshine (2006)
Dir: Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris
Rating: **** out of 5 stars



Little Miss Sunshine is a funny, heart-warming family film. Not a family film in the sense that you should watch it with your 6-year-old; but in the sense that it is about family and how important they are. It is also a refreshingly real take on dysfunctional families. Despite a cynically black sense of humor, the film really touches the heart and leaves you smiling.

Sunshine is about the Hoovers, a dysfunctional American family who must take a roadtrip to California so that young Olive (Abigail Breslin) can fulfill her dream of competing in the "Little Miss Sunshine" beauty pageant.

The film starts off very bleak and unfunny. While the characters are quite real, it is uncomfortable to watch their squabbling. But once the roadtrip is underway, things lighten up. This narrative design brings the audience along for the ride, and like the Hoovers, the viewer gets to experience the family's ennui, and then the subsequent relief from it.

In the role of Olive, Breslin steals this movie. You smile with her, cry with her, cheer for her. I'm not a sensitive person usually, but even I grew some maternal instincts just watching this character. Yes, I choked up a bit, too. Breslin is a great young actress and ideal for this role.

Everyone else is flawless, as well. Greg Kinnear plays Olive's father, who is so wrapped up in his own failed dreams that he has ignored his family. As his stressed out wife, Toni Collette (one of our generation's great actresses) is fantastic. Steve Carrell, proving his dramatic chops, plays Olive's depressed uncle, while Alan Arkin fills the role of the troubled but kindly grandfather - both actors are perfect here. And finally, Paul Dano plays Olive's older brother, who holds nothing but contempt for his family and spends most of the film under a vow of silence. All these performances really make the film. Each feels completely genuine and you may recognize their traits in your own family.

Expect this film to really tug at your heartstrings. It has some very funny moments, but its real strength lies in the way it grabs your emotions. It isn't depressing - a little cynical perhaps, but mostly it'll just make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Don't miss it.

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Silent Hill

Title: Silent Hill (2006)
Dir: Christopher Gans
Rating: **1/2 out of 5 stars



Damn, I was really hoping this one would break the stigma on video game films. With Gans behind the camera (I loved Brotherhood of the Wolf) and Roger Avary writing, how the hell could you go wrong? To its credit, Silent Hill doesn't fail for the same reasons all other video game adaptations have. It doesn't really feel like a video game movie at all. It just fails as a horror film. Mostly.

When Rose's adopted daughter Sharon won't stop sleep-walking and screaming the name "Silent Hill," she decides to find the ghost town and take her daughter there for some answers. Once inside, Sharon disappears and Rose (Radha Mitchell) becomes trapped in the town, which is inhabited by creepy residents and really scary ghosts/demons/somethings. With the help of a cop (Laurie Holden), Rose looks for her daughter and uncovers the town's dark history.

One of my biggest problems with Silent Hill is the usual one - CGI. I just cannot take a horror movie seriously with such half-assed computer graphics. There are some incredible makeup and practical FX guys in the business - USE THEM. Some of the costume design was sweet, though, including some scary nurses and the infamous Pyramid Head, who is a badass-looking but otherwise worthless villain.

I cannot say how accurate the film is to the video game since I have never played it. I've heard it's a good adaptation, and if that's true, well good for them. The film does manage to stand on its own without the video game; however, the movie goes off the deep end about half-way in. Much of Hill makes no sense, or just contradicts itself. And the ending is a complete sham. I guess I am most disappointed with Avary's script, which gets way too complicated and illogical. On second thought, I don't know why that surprises me...

Anyway, Silent Hill does serve up a few creepy moments. I generally like the whole alternate-universe thing going on in the town. And while Pyramid Head doesn't get nearly enough purpose or screentime in this film, he does freak me out when he shows up. As for the gore scenes, most are derivative of other films. But there is one particularly good scene involving Pyramid and a girl; so good in fact that I forgive it for being CGI. You'll know it when you see it.

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