The Departed

Title: The Departed (2006)
Dir: Martin Scorcese
Rating: **** out of 5 stars



Apparently I'm the only person who doesn't think The Departed was 2006's best film, but it is a great film nonetheless. Scorcese delivers all the intense mob drama and gritty violence you expect, and the movie boasts one hell of a cast. Don't make the mistake of thinking Leonardo DiCaprio, Matt Damon, and Mark Wahlberg are just pretty faces. They are in top form here.

The Departed is about two undercover informants - one infiltrating the NYPD (Damon) and the other investigating the Irish mob (DiCaprio). While the police attempt to take down an untouchable mob boss (Jack Nicholson), the two rats gradually become aware of one another and try to take the other out. A lot of blood ensues.

Wahlberg portrays a tough cop, and the only one who suspects Damon. He has the best lines of the film and steals almost every scene he's in. Martin Sheen and Alec Baldwin also turn scene-stealing performances as police officers determined to bring down the mob.

The performances are what really make this film. DiCaprio's constant fear of being exposed and killed keeps the audience on edge. The movie provides some great feuds between DiCaprio and Damon, Wahlberg and Damon, and Sheen and Nicholson. Watching these actors face off is very exciting. Baldwin and Wahlberg also bring some dark comedy to the film's heavy-handed story.

As with most crime dramas, the plot gets complicated at times, but it's nothing you can't sort out by the end. There are some twists and turns you might love or hate - but either way, you'll never see them coming.

I regret not seeing The Departed a second time, as I probably would've liked it even more. It didn't wow me like some other films this year, but it's definitely a top-10'er and sure to garner lots of Oscar buzz. Don't miss it.

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Hard Candy

Title: Hard Candy (2005)
Dir: David Slade
Rating: *** out of 5 stars



Hard Candy is a controversial film about a 14-year old girl (Ellen Page) who meets an older man (Patrick Wilson) from the internet, who may or may not be a sexual predator. As she turns the tables on him, the line between predator and prey becomes blurred. Firstly, I must admit the idea is provokative and bold. Just look at that poster - at first glance you think it's a young girl about to be ensared, but really the girl is bait to trap a predator. I love this idea.

Unfortunately, the film started losing me toward the end. The filmmakers succeeded in making me shift my sympathies between the two characters, but ultimately the story lacked a point. And it veers off on a tangent involving a murder that completely throws off the story. The ending just left me wondering: What's the point? Where is the moral lesson here? The movie started off strong and disturbing, but just couldn't hold onto me.

On the brighter side, the actors were really amazing. Page delivers an intense performance that is mature beyond her years, and Wilson easily slides between sleazy and sympathetic. I also liked the cinematography. It was simple, dark, and perfectly suited to the film. And as I said, the basic idea is great, even though the script lost its touch eventually.

Hard Candy is a complicated movie, and I can imagine people absolutely loving it. But for me personally, there was something missing. It's still a pretty interesting movie and I'd probably even recommend seeing it once. But it could've been so much more.

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The Prestige

Title: The Prestige (2006)
Dir: Christopher Nolan
Rating: ***** out of 5 stars



The Prestige is the second new film this year to get 5 stars from me (the first being V for Vendetta). I don't often give 5 stars, but I loved every second of this movie. The script, the performances, the cinematography - all perfect. Don't be fooled by that lame movie poster - The Prestige is quite possibly the best film of 2006.

Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale play competing magicians in turn-of-the-century London. Once colleagues, Robert Angier and Alfred Borden were driven apart after a tragic accident during their magic show. Their bitter rivalry turns into obsession when Borden performs the "ultimate" illusion and Angier desperately tries to uncover the trick. What follows is Angier and Borden relentlessly trying to one-up each other, which provides neverending suspense. I spent the entire film trying to guess what would happen next, only to have the rug pulled out from under me everytime.

The performances are all flawless. Jackman is the epitome of a man tormented by an obsession (see also, The Fountain) and Bale is the perfect foil. Michael Caine and David Bowie are ideally cast in their supporting roles. Scarlett Johansson's role is less of a character and more of a plot-point, but she is still very good.

What is so very brilliant about this film is that it's an illusion itself. Nolan plays tricks on the mind of the viewer, and his final act floored me in a way I haven't felt since The Usual Suspects. John and Chris Nolan, who co-wrote that other mind-fuck Memento, have constructed a complex, multi-layered story here.

And yet, I walked away from my first viewing understanding the story almost completely. It is brilliant, yet fairly easy to follow. And the more you think about it afterwards, the more it blows your mind. Every tiny detail is important and carefully placed in the story. I suggest you listen to the film's tagline, and watch very closely.

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Click

Title: Click (2006)
Dir: Frank Coraci
Rating: ** out of 5 stars



Let's face it: If Adam Sandler isn't screaming or throwing golf clubs, it's just not funny. Click has some endearing family moments and two titter-worthy jokes, but overall it is pretty dull.

Sandler plays a man struggling to balance his job and his family. While shopping at Bed, Bath and Beyond for a universal remote control, he wanders into the "Beyond" section (get it? ha...ha) and a creepy dude (who else? Christopher Walken) gives him a universal remote. Little does he know that this remote controls not just the TV, but life itself. So he uses the remote to save time and generally make his life easier...until it inevitably backfires on him.

Very little was funny about this film, and some parts downright creeped me out (like Kate Beckinsale's character getting turned on watching the dog hump a stuffed animal). Click actually gets REALLY depressing. Every conceivable tragedy starts happening to Sandler in the second half of the film. Some of these tragic moments were worth keeping, but others are just plain overkill.

And when the movie finally gets to the point of being cripplingly sad (remember, this was supposed to be a comedy), Click pulls one of those appalingly convenient cop-outs. Yes, aspiring filmmakers, if ever you want to back out of a terrible story line, just give the audience a proverbial "just kidding!" and no one will notice.

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The Science of Sleep

Title: The Science of Sleep -aka- La Science des rêves (2006)
Dir: Michel Gondry
Rating: **** out of 5 stars



I'll be honest: this is a WEIRD film. Some of it just confused the hell out of me, but most of it was sweet and visually stimulating. The Science of Sleep is designed to resemble a dream, so Michel Gondry found good use for his signature visual style, and his vivid imagination reaches an all-time high with this film.

Gael Garcia Bernal (Y Tu Mama Tambien) plays Stéphane, a whimsical Mexican man who moves to France in hopes of becoming an illustrator. He gets stuck in an office job instead, but ends up falling for his neighbor Stéphanie (Charlotte Gainsbourg). What transpires thereafter is mostly told through Stéphan's dreams. It gets confusing sometimes (partly because it's told in 3 languages) but it's also pretty cool visually.

There are those among you who will love this movie passionately. It has all the stunning visuals you'd expect from those kooky Frenchmen. And the performances are all great. This was my first Bernal film and I already love the guy. He's so strange and lovable in Science. Gainsbourg is great also, as are Stéphan's co-workers in the film (especially Alain Chabat).

Then there are those among you who will hate this movie, mostly because it sacrifices plot for visuals. In its defense, that is the whole idea. The Science of Sleep is all about dreams, and like a prolonged dream itself, the film veers off on fantastical tangents. It's also pretty cute, as far as the love story goes. Some of the dialogue is downright weird, but you'll get over it. With its quirky characters and bold visuals, I promise it's like nothing you've ever seen.

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Strangers With Candy

Title: Strangers With Candy (2005)
Dir: Paul Dinello
Rating: *** out of 5 stars



I am a huge fan of the show, Strangers With Candy. That love alone earned this film the extra half-star on its rating. Unfortunately, the movie is kinda disappointing.

In this prequel, Amy Sedaris reprises her role as Jerri Blank, the middle-aged former junkie whore who returns to high school. Though inconsistent with the television series, the movie explains Jerri's "origin" story. Not her childhood (that would've been neat) but her life during and after prison. When she returns home, she discovers her daddy in a coma. In an effort to wake him up, Jerri tries to become a better person by returning to high school and subsequently winning a science fair.

Long-time Sedaris collaborators Stephen Colbert and Paul Dinello also reprise their roles as Jerri's self-centered teachers, Chuck Noblet and Geoffrey Jellineck. Their secret, gay relationship becomes strained as Chuck dumps Geoffrey, who then joins forces with Chuck's nemesis (Matthew Broderick). And the wonderful Greg Holliman is back as Principal Blackman. There are a few unfortunate but understandable replacements - namely, Derek and Orlando. The film also boasts big-names like Sarah Jessica Parker, Allison Janney, Phillip Seymore Hoffman, Ian Holm, and Dan Hedaya.

Candy is enjoyable for any fan of the series because who doesn't love seeing their favorite characters return? But don't expect it to be nearly as good as the show - it isn't. Many jokes are recycled, which I understand (need to appeal to newbies) but it's still disappointing. The movie is like one of the show's weaker episodes, only three times as long.

There are quite a few inconsistencies, as well. Much of Jerri's backstory is changed, her daddy is different, Chuck is now a science teacher, and other little things. I can look passed them because I understand the need to draw new fans and make the story more concise, but some hard-headed fans might not be so tolerant.

The film's biggest problem, and biggest deviation from the show, is the format. SWC worked great as a series because it followed the format of short, after-school specials. Each episode was based around a new moral dilemma for Jerri and almost always ended with Jerri not learning her lesson. It was a great parody of those after-school programs. But as a film, SWC is forced to maintain a conhesive plot for almost two hours. And then it tries to be a genuine high school film. This absolutely does not work (Thank you, Alex, for helping me pinpoint this problem).

I'm really not sure if non-fans of the show would like this movie. If they did, they'd surely like the show a LOT more. The film is most appropriate for existing fans of SWC. Even though the film wasn't as funny as it could've been, I'd still love to see them make another one. I just love watching these characters, and I love it when Amy, Paul, and Stephen collaborate. If only they'd ressurect the series...I know, not a chance. Sigh.

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Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Title: Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)
Dir: Tobe Hooper
Rating: **** out of 5 stars



You would think it's tough for a 32-year-old horror movie to still impress, but for me, the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre did just that. Like Evil Dead, no matter how many decades pass and no matter how much you remake it, the original movie will always kick ass. It is truly the grand-daddy of all slasher films and most of its successors can't even come close.

The plot is typical of horror (though Massacre pioneered it): A group of young friends on a roadtrip end up in an isolated area and are gradually picked off by a killer. In this case, a sister and her paraplegic brother visit a town recently victimized by grave robbings to make sure their grandfather's grave is intact. They stay in an old family house, along with three of their friends. You can guess what happens next.

Although the build-up to the killings is an hour long, I hardly noticed. There is an effectively creepy scene with a hitchhiker (nothing like the one in the remake) and Tobe Hooper generally builds upon the eerie atmosphere. Then we are finally introduced to Leatherface, as he later became known (but not in this film). Even more frightening is his family, especially the grandfather who is easily one of the scariest characters in the history of horror cinema.

The final scenes of the movie are the absolute best. If you had any problems with the beginning of the movie, you'll definitely forget them by then. I honestly had no idea how the film was going to end, and I found myself screaming at the television: "RUN BITCH RUNNNN!!"

Perhaps most impressive of all is Tobe Hooper's guerilla filmmaking. The directing is innovative and the grainy filmstock really sets the right tone. I think people consider this a very gory movie, but it actually isn't at all - it's just so scary, you tend to forget it didn't even need the blood. Hooper really knows how to terrify. It doesn't surprise me he later made Poltergeist, which still scares the shit out of me. Hell, the title alone makes me uneasy. With Massacre, he turned a shoestring budget and a small nobody cast into a groundbreaking horror film that really lives up to its reputation.

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District B13

Title: District B13 -aka- Banlieue 13 (2004)
Dir: Pierre Morel
Rating: *** out of 5 stars



I'm a month behind, so I'm gonna make this quick:

District B13 is about a future where Paris is broken up into crime-ridden districts blocked off by walls and police barricades. After the most dangerous district, B13, steals a missile with intentions to sell it, the French government enlists a cop to get it back. He is reluctantly teamed up with the only man who can get him inside B13 - a convict who grew up there. Together they kick some ass and save the day - you know the drill.

Lame and cliche as that plot sounds, it's not that bad. And it has a twist that is far more interesting, but it's a spoiler, so shhh.

Intellectual it is not. It's just an action film. It is most comparable to The Transporter, but in some ways, better. If you liked that movie, you will enjoy District B13. If you generally like brainless action films, you will enjoy District B13.

If you enjoy martials arts, or cheap variations of it, the two main guys are pretty fun to watch (and easy on the eyes). The film isn't particularly memorable, as this short review should prove, but it was an entertaining two hours, nonetheless.

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Confetti

Title: Confetti (2006)
Dir: Debbie Isitt
Rating: *** out of 5 stars



Confetti follows in the tradition of Christopher Guest mockumentaries like Waiting for Guffman and Best in Show. In this film, a wedding magazing called Confetti throws a contest in which three couples get their "dream" theme wedding and then a panel of judges will choose the most original one.

The magazine's owner, portrayed by Jimmy Carr, sums up the contest (and the film's plot) perfectly: "Not everyone wants the most important day of their life ruined by a gimmick...but some do!"

The handpicked contestants consist of:
1) A sweet, young couple with a fondness for musicals
2) Two very ambitious, very competitive tennis players
3) A naturist couple. That is, nudists.

The camera basically follows each couple, along with Confetti's staff and two flamboyant wedding planners. Much (if not all) of Confetti's dialogue was improvised, just like in Guest's films. But unfortunately, it is not nearly so funny. The movie has a few great moments, but aims more for the heart than the funny bone. And cute it is, but still not enough.

Playing the musical-loving couple are two of my favorite British actors, Martin Freeman (The Office) and Jessica Stevenson (Spaced). Neither reaches the charm of their previous performances, but they are always a joy to watch in anything, together or individually. The other four contestants were all pretty good too, especially the tennis couple who provided a few really funny moments.

My favorite performances overall came from the wedding planners, played by Jason Watkins and Vincent Franklin. They, much like Freeman and Stevenson's characters, were the least vindictive, most sincere people in the film, thus making them my favorites. Watkins and Franklin also lent the movie its funniest scenes.

I know this review doesn't sound negative enough to warrant 3 stars, but in short, the movie just wasn't funny enough to really grab me. It's possible it could grow on me if I ever saw the film again. It does have a pretty quirky, likable cast and a wonderful premise. And there is no shortage of full-front male nudity, if you're into that sort of thing. And if not, consider this your warning.

Confetti is a cute little attempt at capturing that mockumentary style Guest nails so well, but it just doesn't get there. Still, I wouldn't mind a second try, Brits!

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