15 Funniest TV Lawyers

15. Alan Shore and Denny Crane, Boston Legal

James Spader and William Shatner played these two quirky lawyers and womanizing best friends on Boston Legal. Alan was the brilliant but funny left-winger with a fear of clowns and a love of the ladies. Denny was the narcissistic Conservative who loved guns and saying his own name. Their head-butting was often great, especially when guns came into play:


14. Harvey Birdman, Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law

This titular character was often the straight man in a circus of hilarious supporting characters but Harvey could be seriously funny in a very dry, random way. Gary Cole voiced this superhero-turned-attorney who defended an array of Hannah Barbera cartoon characters. In this clip, he represents Shaggy and Scooby Doo:

13. Bob Loblaw, Arrested Development

The very existence of Bob Loblaw is a perfect example of the humor of Arrested Development. Bob first appears in season 3 as the Bluth family lawyer. The first great thing about Loblaw is the fact that he's played by Scott Baio - who replaced Henry Winkler, a fact that is hilariously alluded to. And of course there's the tongue-twisting name that frequently results in a great line like, "You don't need double talk. You need Bob Loblaw." It only gets more complicated when he starts that law blog...


12. Rodney Ruxin, The League

I only placed Ruxin this low on the list because his profession rarely plays into the humor of the character but make no mistake, this guy is hilarious. He is a giant asshole and we love him for it. His crushing insults and frequent exclamations of "Forever uncleeeean!" are classic.



11. Keyrock, Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer, SNL

It is easy for 20-year old Saturday Night Live sketches to disappear in the recesses of my brain, but this one never left me. Created by Jack Handey and performed by Phil Hartman, Keyrock was a neanderthal that was preserved in ice, then unfrozen and went to law school. Despite being wealthy and well-educated, he repeatedly claims to be primitive and confused in order to sway juries (see clip):

10. Jackie Chiles, Seinfeld

Phil Morris portrayed this Johnnie Cochran parody with grandiose vocabulary and rhyming adjectives. Jackie represented Kramer in many-a silly situation, including a coffee spilling case (see clip) and a cigarette smoke disfigurement suit.

9. Hyper-Chicken, Futurama

He did not appear often, but the hyper-chicken (or simply, "chicken lawyer" as many call him) made a hilarious impression whenever he did. Oh, the irony of his Colonel Sanders outfit and Southern drawl.

8. John Cage, Ally McBeal

Peter MacNicol won an Emmy for his portrayal of John Cage, half of the Cage & Fish law firm on Ally McBeal. Also known affectionately as "The Biscuit", John was full of eccentricities (Porky Pig stutter, nose whistle) and quirky habits (humming in court, screaming like a girl). 

7. Dan Fielding, Night Court

John Larroquette played Dan Fielding, the sex-crazy narcissistic prosecutor. He would try anything to get a woman to sleep with him, especially public defender, Christine Sullivan. Dan was always a great source for snide one-liners and insults. Fielding was also great at reaction shots (see clip):

6. Ted Buckland, Scrubs

Sam Lloyd plays Sacred Heart's resident sad sack and attorney, Ted. Respected by no one and constantly demeaned by Dr. Kelso, Ted is depressive and suicidal. That may not sound hilarious but it so is. Here he is competing with a dog for approval:

5. Lionel Hutz, The Simpsons

This shyster lawyer, voiced by Phil Hartman, frequently shows up on The Simpsons whenever there is money to be made. His law firm, located in a shopping mall, is called "I Can't Believe It's a Law Firm!" and his business card turns into a sponge when you put it in water.

4. Phil Ken Sebben, Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law

Whether or not Phil is actually a lawyer is suspect, but he does run a law firm so let's say yeah. The one-eyed boss with a fondness for innuendo is voiced to perfection by Stephen Colbert. His brazen behavior and classic "HA-HA-HA!"s never fail to inspire a good laugh.

3. Saul Goodman, Breaking Bad

This may be the only non-comedy show on this list, but much of the humor on Breaking Bad comes from this guy. That should come as no surprise considering he is portrayed by Bob Odenkirk (Mr. Show). Saul Goodman, who actually made up a fake name to sound Jewish, is your classic self-interested shyster lawyer. As Jesse would say, Saul is not just a criminal lawyer, but a criminal...lawyer. And there is no pickle he can't get you out of, so if you're a scumbag too, better call Saul!

2. Jack Kelly, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Here is another guy whose legal credentials may be hard to find, but if Uncle Jack says he's a lawyer, then okay! The interest in law obviously runs in the family, what with Charlie's knowledge of "bird law." Jack, however, is more interested in hand size and the whereabouts of little boys he can "wrestle" with.

1. Barry Zuckerkorn, Arrested Development

Of all the brilliant recurring roles on Arrested Development, Barry may be the greatest. Henry Winkler is absolutely hilarious as the inept attorney who frequents transsexual prostitutes and knows exactly what balls look like up close.

Honorable Mention:

Mitchell Pritchett, Modern Family

He may not be the funniest character on Modern Family (or even top 3) but Mitchell definitely has his moments. Jesse Tyler Ferguson's uptight gay lawyer shines when he's running from pigeons or trying to convince everyone how tough he is like this:

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Tucker & Dale vs. Evil

Film: Tucker & Dale vs. Evil (2010)
Dir: Eli Craig
Rating: ****1/2 out of 5 stars



Horror-comedies were big in the 1980s, but sort of dwindled in the 1990s. In 2004, Edgar Wright’s Shaun of the Dead revitalized the sub-genre, and ever since, there have been dozens and dozens of them released. Some are fantastic, but many don’t quite get it. A great horror-comedy requires the right balance of dark humor and a sincere love of the genre. A horror fan can easily distinguish between a hollow spoof and a true horror-comedy. Fortunately, Eli Craig’s Tucker & Dale vs. Evil is of the latter variety, with solid performances, hilarious situational humor, and definite respect for horror.

Tucker (Alan Tudyk) and Dale (Tyler Labine) are two ordinary redneck friends who just bought their own vacation home in the backwoods. Tucker is the leader of the duo, while Dale is a hopeless romantic with low self-esteem. While fixing up their cabin in the woods, they repeatedly encounter a group of college kids on break. Dale’s unsuccessful attempt at talking to a pretty girl sets off a chain of misunderstandings wherein the students become convinced that the two rednecks are psycho killers. As the college kids decide to go after their would-be killers, Dale and Tucker fear for their own lives.

The concept alone of Tucker & Dale vs. Evil is fantastic. It recalls mistaken-identity screwball comedies of the 1930s and 1940s, only it is also infused with everything horror fans love about the genre. It is a hilarious parody of massacre-style flicks (i.e. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre) where the killers are typically rednecks who look just like Tucker and Dale. But these good ol’ boys just want to fish, drink beer, and enjoy their vacation in peace. Meanwhile, the college kids really believe they are being picked off by hillbillies because they are too scared, too dumb, and watch too many horror movies to just shut up and listen.

Tudyk and Labine are both fantastic in their titular roles. They have great buddy chemistry and comedic timing. Some of the actors playing the college kids are also good, particularly Jesse Moss who thinks he is Rambo but looks like Tom Cruise in a popped collar. Even though misunderstanding and miscommunication are comedy staples that have been beaten to death, these qualities are actually really funny here. This is situational comedy at its finest. As a horror flick, Tucker & Dale is not bad either. It racks up quite a body count and delivers some fun gore scenes. Horror fans will also love all the inside references to the genre and its conventions.

At first glance, Eli Craig’s filmography doesn’t inspire confidence with titles like Space Cowboys and The Rage: Carrie 2, but fortunately he only acted in those. As a director, on the other hand, the man has a real future. This movie proves he has the skills to helm either a horror or a comedy with ease - or perhaps another horror-comedy if we’re lucky. There have been tons of horror-comedies released over the last few years, and while some are great, most lack this perfect pacing and wit. Severance was pretty good and parodied the same massacre-horror sub-genre, but Tucker & Dale is better all-around.

Many films have claimed to be "the next Shaun of the Dead" or some variation there of. In the case of Tucker & Dale vs. Evil, it is actually true. Like that movie, this one has lovable characters, lots of blood, and laugh-out-loud humor. This is definitely one of the best horror-comedies of the last decade. The only thing that could have been improved is the film’s title – the “vs. Evil” part misrepresents what the movie is about. The plot is far more clever than the title implies. Of course this is a petty complaint – the film is fantastic. Hopefully it will rightfully achieve the same cult status that Shaun did and keep the horror-comedy genre kicking for a few more years.

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Four Lions

Film: Four Lions (2010)
Dir: Chris Morris
Rating: **** out of 5 stars



Cinema’s greatest satires have often been made while the issue at hand was still fresh and audiences were sensitive to it. Just as Dr. Strangelove satirized the Cold War as it was going on, Four Lions parodies Islamic extremists, as well as the Western world’s prejudice against Muslims. The timing could not be better, especially with the recent controversy over a mosque being built near Ground Zero. This is not a film for easily offended people – it may be politically accurate but it is not politically correct. The film does not pull its punches against either side, and it manages to make you laugh at things that would normally make you shudder. There is also a surprising amount of emotion peeking through the dark satire.

Omar (Riz Ahmed) is a British-born man of the Muslim faith who runs a small jihadist cell in London. He believes that Muslims around the world are being oppressed, and to help the problem he must become a soldier or even a martyr. After a failed attempt at joining a terrorist training camp, Omar plots to send a message by staging a bombing in London. This proves to be no easy task as Omar’s jihadist mates are morons, each having a different idea about how to fight their non-Muslim oppressors. Among them is Barry (Nigel Lindsay), an angry white Islamic convert; Waj (Kayvan Novak), a dim-witted follower; Fessal (Adeel Akhtar), a skittish bomb-maker; and Hassan (Arsher Ali), a young wannabe terrorist/rapper.

The dark humor in Four Lions is consistent and effective. Some of it might make you feel guilty for laughing, but you will laugh nevertheless. Each character is hilarious in his own way, plus the inherent satire is ever-present. Whether you are giggling at the idiotic antics of these men, or smirking at the socio-political irony throughout, you will not be bored. Upon first viewing, I missed quite a few jokes because the characters’ British accents are thick and they talk so fast, but I still laughed loud and often. I cannot wait to watch it again – perhaps with the English subtitles on next time.

Although you may be laughing at these failed wannabe terrorists, the film does not insult the Muslim faith, nor does it justify American and British treatment of Muslims. Each character is likable and sympathetic. You can tell they truly believe what they are doing is right. Still, the movie exposes the flaws in extremists’ logic via satire. It also explores the way non-violent Muslims are often discriminated against because of their extremist counterparts. The film is surprisingly touching and undeniably clever. The script was written by the same guys who penned In the Loop, the hilarious political farce from last year. The two films have a lot in common in terms of humor, mood, and how completely spot-on the satire is.

The screenwriters are not the only ones to thank for the funny, likable anti-heroes – all the actors involved are great. They are never two-dimensional stereotypes or cheap gags. You cannot help but care about these characters, even though your first instinct is to hate them, especially if you are an American. Ahmed and Novak give especially sympathetic performances, as their characters are the least influenced by narcissism or selfishness. Omar genuinely believes in what he is doing, and Waj just wants to be like his friend.

Four Lions is a stellar feature film debut for director Chris Morris. Terrorism is not an easy topic to tackle, but Morris and the screenwriters handle it with tact and fairness, while never sacrificing honesty or humor. The film is powerful, hilarious, moving, and an absolute must-see.

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20 Greatest Horror Movie Taglines

Please check out my lists of the 20 greatest horror movie taglines on The Horror Channel:



Part 1 (20-11)

Part 2 (10-1)

Please comment and discuss :)

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Not Quite Hollywood

Film: Not Quite Hollywood: The Wild, Untold Story of Ozploitation! (2009)
Dir: Mark Hartley.
Rating: ****1/2 out of 5 stars

Prior to the 1970s, the Australian film industry was practically non-existent. That decade marked the arrival of important Aussie cinema such as Peter Weir's Picnic at Hanging Rock but the social revolutions of the time also spawned a plethora of genre films, affectionately known as "Ozploitation" movies. Mark Hartley's documentary Not Quite Hollywood explores these lesser-known movies and their impact on world cinema. The film is not only informative, but is as exciting and fun as the movies it's portraying.

NQH begins with the history of Australia's film industry, or rather lack thereof. Few Aussies were making movies, and those who tried were marred by extreme censorship. But in 1971, the R-certificate (rating) was introduced and thus opened the door for sex and violence on the big screen. This documentary breaks the genre films into three major waves - sex romps; exploitation horror; and high-octane action flicks.

The early 70s birthed the iconic "ocker" Barry McKenzie, an Australian looking for sex in prudish England. These comedies were known for debauchery, vulgarity, and gross-out humor. There were also a lot of sex comedies that pushed the envelope with endless boobs and bush. This is the least exciting portion of the documentary, but that doesn't say much, as it is still hilarious and enlightening.

The middle section of the film covers the extreme horror - needless to say, my favorite part of the documentary. Virtually every movie mentioned is a must-see - Patrick, Long Weekend, Roadgames, Howling 3, Razorback, Next of Kin, Dark Age, and more. We get outback thrillers, supernatural chillers, and psychopathic killers. Oh, and a giant ravenous pig. What's not to love?

The third portion of the movie focuses on the wild action movies that were dominated by explosions, kung fu, car chases, and biker gangs. Examples include Mad Max, Stone, Turkey Shoot, Mad Dog Morgan, The Man From Hong Kong, and Fair Game. This is another part of the documentary where you want to take notes so you will remember to watch all these awesome movies.

In addition to an impressive array of film clips, the movie offers hilarious interviews with virtually every major Ozploitation filmmaker, along with actors, critics, and film experts. Their anecdotes are some of the funniest I've ever heard. A few of the better known interviewees include Barry Humphries (Dame Edna), Dennis Hopper, Stacy Keach, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Quentin Tarantino, who bounces with fanboy excitement.

Hartley also injects a lot of cartoony humor into the documentary's look, so it is never boring. With a filmography of short Ozploitation docs under his belt, the man clearly knows his stuff, but his sense of humor is also quite evident here. Nobody could have made this better. If I absolutely had to find one flaw, it would only be the time spent on newer Aussie films (Undead, Wolf Creek) as those films, exploitative though they may be, are neither good nor influential, and people like me know enough about them already. But it's a petty observation - Not Quite Hollywood is an impressive tribute to Ozploitation and one damn entertaining movie.

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In The Loop

Film: In the Loop (2009)
Dir: Armando Iannucci
Rating: ****1/2 out of 5 stars



You'd be hard-pressed to find a funnier film than In the Loop this year. This spot-on political comedy is full of hilarious characters, biting commentary, and endless quotables. It is a full-length spin-off of the acclaimed BBC television show "The Thick of It."

Loop follows the inner workings of British and American politicians as they scramble to promote and/or avert an impending war in the Middle East. It accurately - and hilariously - portrays the lengths to which these people will go to push their respective agendas. We see how both sides are not above manipulatation, lies, and spinning the facts.

The entire cast is wonderful, British and American alike. Tom Hollander plays Simon Foster, a British cabinet minister who becomes an unwitting political pawn when he uses a poor choice of words in regards to the war. Hollander is adorably funny, as a politician with good intentions but virtually no public speaking skills. He is hounded by the prime minister's cruel aide Malcolm Tucker - played to absolute perfection by Peter Capaldi. Reprising his role from the show, he absolutely steals the film with his vulgarity. Not a man you'd want to meet in real life. Ever. But god is he funny!

Among the better knowns: James Gandolfini as a pacifistic U.S. general; David Rasche as a war-hungry politician; and Steve Coogan as a pissed off British constituent. I also enjoyed Chris Addison, Anna Chlumsky, and Zach Woods as cut-throat government interns. I could go on and on, as I really love everyone in this movie.

In the Loop definitely has a dark side, as particularly evident in its anti-climactic ending. But the satire always hits the mark, and I promise you will hurt from laughter - if only because of Malcolm Tucker (who will go down as one of the greatest comedy characters ever, guaranteed).

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My Favorite Movie Douchebags

Check out my article over at JohnnyVengeance.net on the best movie douchebags:

http://johnnyvengeance.net/2009/07/10-great-cinematic-douchebags/

And look around, it's a great site :)

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Fanboys

Film: Fanboys (2008)
Dir: Kyle Newman
Rating: *** out of 5 stars

Fanboys is like a time capsule for Star Wars geeks. It captures that feeling of naive joy that fans felt in the months preceding the release of The Phantom Menace. It recalls a time when George Lucas was still redeemable; when Darth Vader wasn't a whiney bitch; and when Jar Jar Binks did not exist. Then Episode I came along, and it was as if millions of voices cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. At least we can look back on the hype with fond memories - like a calm before the storm. This film, though not without its flaws, captures that nostalgia fairly well.

Set in the pre-Menace days, Fanboys follows a group of teenagers who scheme to raid George Lucas' Skywalker Ranch in hopes of stealing a print of the unreleased prequel, since their dying friend Linus won't live long enough to see it otherwise. Along the way, their misadventures involve the police, prostitutes, a lot of angry Trekkies, and Harry Knowles. It's basically a roadtrip movie of the geekiest kind.

The biggest draw for non-Wars fans is the cast, comprised of Kristen Bell, Dan Fogler, Sam Huntington, Jay Baruchel, and Chris Marquette. There are also a few Apatow-camp cameos. But let's be honest - this film is by, for, and about Star Wars fans. It is loaded with trilogy cameos and endless in-references. There may be a few moments of general humor, but the laughs are largely esoteric. So if you've never had a pretend lightsabre fight in your bedroom, this is not the movie for you.

As an all-purpose geek and fan of Lucas' original trilogy, I enjoyed Fanboys for the most part. Not all the jokes work, and some of the Wars references are amateur, but overall it's okay. My biggest complaint is the subplot involving Marquette's character Linus dying of cancer. It adds superfluous drama to an otherwise light-hearted comedy. And as a plot point, it is unnecessary. These guys don't need a reason to storm Skywalker Ranch other than the fact that it's a crazy break from their boring lives.

Now, I can appreciate the need to make them get off their butts and do it after years of promising they would. That is why the film has a subplot of two estranged friends - Eric and Linus - who decide to make amends. That motive was enough, the latter didn't also have to be dying. It's completely unecessary and distracting. It also cheapens the repaired-friendship bit because it seems like Eric only planned the adventure out of guilt, rather than a desire to get his friend back.

Anyway, for fans of Star Wars or general geekdom, Fanboys provides decent laughs and a pleasant sense of nostalgia for 1998. It is specifically aimed at us nerds, who secretly love being in a select group of people who get jokes about Tatooine and trash compactors. If you feel that geek pride, you are bound to enjoy this movie at least a little. On the other hand, if you don't even know what a Wookiee is, you should look elsewhere.

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Drag Me to Hell

Film: Drag Me to Hell (2009)
Dir: Sam Raimi
Rating: ***** out of 5 stars

For me, this is the cinematic equivalent of the second coming of Christ. I don't care if that offends you, I really mean it. This is Sam Raimi's epic return to horror and it more than delivers. It is scary, funny, outrageous, and dripping with Raimi's distinctive style. You'd be hard-pressed to find a better time at the theater this year.

Loan officer Christine Brown (Allison Lohman) is up for a promotion to assistant manager. After her boss informs her that she must "make the tough decisions" to get ahead, Christine denies an elderly gypsy woman an extension on her mortgage. She suffers the consequence when the woman places a curse upon her, whereby a vicious demon haunts the victim and ultimately drags them to Hell. With the help of her boyfriend, a medium, and a seer, Christine tries everything possible to dissuade the demon from taking her soul.

Drag Me to Hell will make you jump, scream, laugh, and possibly gag. This was exactly Raimi's intention, as the director loves the elicit a response from his audience. His self-proclaimed "spook-a-blast" has definitely achieved that goal. It is scary, hilarious, unique, and so damn fun. Do not be deceived by its PG-13 rating - this movie really pushes the envelope with gore and gross stuff. It is completely over-the-top in the best possible way.

I loved Lohman in the lead role. Originally, Ellen Page was cast in this role but dropped out. I am so glad she did because Lohman nails the sweet innocence of Christine. Her progression into desperation and borderline madness is perfect. Page would have been far too angsty and tough for the part. Lohman also takes a couple Bruce Campbell-style beatings. She is a real trooper. The rest of the cast are great, as well, even Justin Long who I usually am not a fan of.

So many moments in this movie recalled the Evil Dead films - even some direct references and recycled sound FX! For a Raimi fan like me, this is pure heaven. Sam is back in original form here with canted camera angles, twisted humor, and brilliant use of sound. He also recruited his friends - the greatest FX team in the business KNB - to handle the practical effects. As always, they did a great job. The only downside of this movie is it makes me literally ache for Evil Dead 4. If you have any doubts that another Evil Dead film could be as good as its predecessors, Drag will completely shatter them.

If you have not seen this film yet, GO! NOW! It is imperative that you see it in theaters with other people because it is one hell of a film-going experience. At each viewing I attended, the audience's screams, laughter, and stomping roared louder than anything I've ever heard. Believe me when I tell you this film is 100% unadulterated fun.

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Zombie Night

Film: Zombie Night (2003)
Dir: David J. Francis
Rating: * out of 5 stars



Everything is wrong about this movie - script, acting, FX, cinematography - everything. But I gave it 1 star because it made me laugh. A lot. It probably wasn't intentional, but this was the hardest I have laughed in a while.

This mess of a movie is supposed to take place post-nuclear war, with the world overrun by zombies and only a small number of human survivors. They only real plot of the film is these characters moving from one refuge to another, and they meet some asshole who wants revenge after being expelled from the group.

Beyond that, there is no story. It is a meandering mess full of plot holes and terrible dialogue. Characters in this say and do the absurd, unrealistic things you can think of. Needless to say, the production value is piss poor. It looks like something I made in my backyard with a home video camera. There are cars on freeways in the background despite the setting being a war-ravaged wasteland. The FX are pretty lame, save for one shotgun-blast-to-a-zombie-leg that not only makes me laugh hysterically but looks pretty good, actually.

Now for the very worst of it (or best, depending on your mood) - the acting. This is priceless. Not a single person in this rises above laughably bad. Honestly, it's so hilariously awful that I almost want to recommend it. If you like bad movies, this is a must-see. If you are morbidly curious and don't want to sit through the whole thing, just watch this instead:

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